At 20:54:03 on 10.02.10, kimmi9080 wrote:
Hi All, I am looking for advice to gain confidence when in the stable with my horse. my horse is on loan from my riding school (he is the owners) i have had him 3 months now and before xmas we built up a brilliant relationship and i got over my fears! (always been a bit nervous as only started riding again 6 months ago after 11 yr break and im learning everything all over again) unfortunaly my fears have now returned with a vengence and i'm finding excuses not to go near him I must say that he doesn't have the best stable manners with un-confident people and he does tend to play power trip e.g trapping me in the stable, trying to stand on feet (he isn't a kicker but a foot stander)i need to overcome this problem because as soon as i go into the stable he turns his butt on me knowing i will run out, i'm too scared to even tie him up (yet i know he won't really hurt me) Anyone have any tips for overcoming my fear in the stable?? its starting to effect my riding (iv'e lost all sense of balance now lol! and i can't keep my heals down) I also need tips on how to keep my heals down and get better balance (my instructor wants me to compete in dressage this season as my horse has done advanced dressage but quite frankly i'm too rubbish and i can't anyway without any confidence Please help Thanks xx

At 16:25:05 on 11.02.10, Flicka wrote:
Firstly stop saying you are rubbish lol!!! With the riding don't think about pushing your heels down. Maybe it is because you are tense you are gripping. Instead relax your legs right out of the hip socket, relax the knee and just let the weight fall down through your legs. If you force your heel down it will push your leg forward anyway and put you out of balance. As for the problems in the stable, he's just being a horse and is pushing you around because he knows he can. Basically he is moving you around rather than you moving him and to a horse this means he's top dog. So you need to quietly and firmly put him in his place. But you have to mean it. So when you're not with him work on feeling positive and strong and then take that energy with you into the stable. He must respect your space. You need to work on some exercises leading and backing him up etc. I really recommend a book called 101 horsemanship exercises by Rio Barrett which you can get on Amazon.

At 19:48:16 on 11.02.10, plodalong wrote:
horses are naturally curious animals, they like to know whats going on, every time he turns his bum towards you bang your halter on the wall and when he turns to look at what you are doing stop immediatly, even if he only thinks about looking at you, and smile.keep doing it and eventually he will think he has trained you to be quiet by turning to face you.He may be picking up your insecurities and doesnt think you are a suitable leader. you can show him you are,by doing what Flicka suggested, teach him to back away and respect your space, you will gain confidence in the knowledge that he isnt going to stand on your foot or block your exit..He will gain confidence in your leadership.You are not rubbish,You are not rubbish, sing it to yourself, take deep breaths and he will mirror you and do the same.In a few weeks you will look back at this thread and say to yourself,"look how far we have come" Have some faith in your own abilities and recognise the skills you already posess.

At 20:59:47 on 12.02.10, kimmi9080 wrote:
Thanks for your replies, i will take a look at the books you suggest. I'm pleased to say we had a really good session yesterday, i went with a positive attitude and he behaved in the stable, when he did get a bit stubbon i stood my ground and didn't move...he backed off and stood quietly. I was estatic and then we had a good ride with no stirrups to help my balance, that went great to Thanks for replys and advice x

At 22:23:05 on 12.02.10, plodalong wrote:
well done.

At 13:00:50 on 14.02.10, appy Karen wrote:
It's very difficult to instill confidence if you have lost it but horses are instinctual creatures and will know if your nervious of them or tense in anyway! try to adopt some relaxation tecniques into your daily regime, breathing, and postive thinking you will be amased at the difference this will make! other than this go back to basics and try to loan a quieter horse and build you confidenc back up.

At 15:39:49 on 14.02.10, missasequinedesign wrote:
Congratulations on your good day in the stable! Just remember the power of positive thinking; tell yourself that you are confident, and believe that you are confident. Fear is a strange thing, and sometimes it is difficult to get past, but positive thinking should definitely help!

At 18:31:13 on 14.02.10, Tweek wrote:
I saw this and had to join the group... Brilliant advice for in the stable.... now for the advice riding.... get a different instructor! It's all very well having long term goals but if she isn't helping you work on your short term ones or helping you address being comfortable on and around your horse then tell her to go jump and certainly don't pay for the pleasure! You shouldn't have to care what your horse has done previously... it's lovely to know they have, but so ****ing what! (excuse my *'ing but instructors like that can put people off for life and it drives me mad!)... if it was THAT good it would still be doing it, so don't let anyone intimidate you. You are not rubbish... because, if you were, the owner of the yard would not let you have their own horse on loan. (that bit was written before I read the whole thread lol) Sounds like you have had a good day and that sounds like a great building block to start from, try not to think back beyond that and use the good day as the start of your new relationship with him. It's really easy to get down about the little things, but slowly slowly one step at a time, maybe ask your instructor to work on your balance and not mention a dressage test for a while, just remember to keep it varied and interesting for the both of you and chances are you'll wonder what you were worried about in three months time from now :-) Good luck!

At 19:57:04 on 14.02.10, kimmi9080 wrote:
thanks for the advice again. I have kept positive since and he has been consistently happy and so have i. Working more on balance but i must say i am trying a test next week. Its dressage day at the yard and im doing 2002 prelim test 7, having watched it a few times i think i can manage it...just need a better copy of it lol!! Thanks so much for all your encouragement, i will keep you all posted :-)

At 04:36:52 on 15.02.10, Tora617 wrote:
Hey, I love the fact that you are seeing some progress and are feeling more confident. Have you tried any simple round penning moves? You can even do it with the help of a coach in the arena if you want. I find that it really helps establish that bond with your horse and helps you (as a rider) to feel more confident. I met a woman from New Mexico who taught this to me with several icelandic horses (all in one day) and we spent about 20 minutes per horse working on simple movements (walking up the horse once it is stopped and standing still, then walking away and once your horse follows you without holding a lead you are ready to move onto riding. It really helped to relax me and my mounts, all of which was the first time I was riding them). I hope this doesn't sound too vague. I hope the other suggestions to read some books helps you out with it. But once you get back into the groove and spend some more time getting into the body language of it, I am sure you will start portraying better confidence to your mount. Happy riding!